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college/employment advice needed
- Thread starter CrazyCawi
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CrazyCawi
New Member
Milton might take it upon himself to do a ridiculous amount of research and make someone from her employment aware that I asked this question.
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Chucker
Active Member
I would suggest that, if you squash this for her, it will come up repeatedly for years whenever she is unhappy because she doesn't have her degree. Sorry, it might not come up for years if she decides she doesn't want to marry a dream squasher.
If the roles were reversed and she told you that you couldn't do it, what would you do and how would it make you feel about her? And don't say you'd understand, because you've been blowing money on bikes and accessories for a few years with little regard for that debt you've incurred.
If the roles were reversed and she told you that you couldn't do it, what would you do and how would it make you feel about her? And don't say you'd understand, because you've been blowing money on bikes and accessories for a few years with little regard for that debt you've incurred.
It took less than 5 minutes to find his wife's name, where she works, where she goes/went to school, and where she grew up. It took under a minute to match Josh's real name with his handle s/n here, knowing only his real name.
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No, I wouldn't (sad that you think that I might), but someone else might. You never know who reads what you write.
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Blue-Sun
Elite Member
OK... Here is my two cents.
I'm not a fan of taking on more debt, as there is already $90K in student loan debt (especially in this uncertain economy). Do you have other debt like mortgage, vehicle payments, credit card debt, etc.??
Interest (in all of its forms) simple interest, compound interest, finance charges, late fees, etc. are the "Dream Killer"; not you or the decisions you make.
Student debt cannot be "washed away" in bankruptcy either, it stays with you until death or you pay it off.
If she doesn't like her job, there may be another facility where she can do the same type of work. It may be the people she works with that are causing the angst and not the "work" itself.
My opinion, continue to work (somewhere) and continue to go to school part time.
I'm not a fan of taking on more debt, as there is already $90K in student loan debt (especially in this uncertain economy). Do you have other debt like mortgage, vehicle payments, credit card debt, etc.??
Interest (in all of its forms) simple interest, compound interest, finance charges, late fees, etc. are the "Dream Killer"; not you or the decisions you make.
Student debt cannot be "washed away" in bankruptcy either, it stays with you until death or you pay it off.
If she doesn't like her job, there may be another facility where she can do the same type of work. It may be the people she works with that are causing the angst and not the "work" itself.
My opinion, continue to work (somewhere) and continue to go to school part time.
togle5
New Member
Doing what you got to do is more important than being happy sometimes. Suck it the - up and make the best out of it. One year isn't that big of a difference and definitely isn't worth adding debt.
RooKie
New Member
Agreed. This would be something to try that isn't very drastic and, who knows, maybe she'll end up enjoying the new place.
If the change of atmosphere doesn't help make things easier on her, then would be a good time to reconsider the switch of work and school schedules.
Chucker
Active Member
Almost 20 years ago, my wife made more than I did, but she wasn't happy. She wanted to quit her job and start up her own business. I didn't even consider saying "no", because I knew that if she wasn't happy in her job, she wouldn't be happy in her life. If she wasn't happy in her life, she would make me unhappy in mine. We didn't have a house, but were looking to buy one. We put that off so she could start her business. She made no money for several years, and I supported her in that. In the meantime, I progressed in my career and she supported me in every decision I made, even when I was unhappy and quit my job to go look for another one. Her response was, "We'll figure it out. You need to be happy." When it came to our careers, we only ever supported each other's decisions. Today, she makes executive level money, loves what she does, we live in the house we want, in the neighbourhood we want, and don't worry about money because we don't have to.
My point is, that regret is a b!tch. Years from now, if you both get to do what you want with your careers, you'll be much happier, have few regrets, and you'll look back on these times and realize it wasn't that bad, and you'll be thankful you supported each other.
Or, you could suck it up, let your current situation control your future, and hope that regret doesn't drive you apart and make you wish you'd taken a different path. There are a lot rich people that are unhappy and a lot of poor people that are happy. Old people rarely look back on their lives thinking, "I'm really glad I worried more about finances than my relationships. Look at all of the money I have as I lie here all alone on my death bed."
My point is, that regret is a b!tch. Years from now, if you both get to do what you want with your careers, you'll be much happier, have few regrets, and you'll look back on these times and realize it wasn't that bad, and you'll be thankful you supported each other.
Or, you could suck it up, let your current situation control your future, and hope that regret doesn't drive you apart and make you wish you'd taken a different path. There are a lot rich people that are unhappy and a lot of poor people that are happy. Old people rarely look back on their lives thinking, "I'm really glad I worried more about finances than my relationships. Look at all of the money I have as I lie here all alone on my death bed."
latony007
New Member
I think Milton is a cop, of worse, works for the NSA 
I think Milton is a cop, of worse, works for the NSA
Kaiser Soze! Look up USSID 18, I used to have to keep a laminated card on me at all times. I finally stopped carrying it a while back when cleaning out my wallet. Not sure why I carried it so long.
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CrazyCawi
New Member
I really like what you had to say thank you
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CrazyCawi
New Member
I didn't mean it in a derogatory way Milton, I meant it as in you have this surreal knowledge of how the inter-web work, I wish I knew some of the inter-workings like you do.
Mix common sense with a "Live Each Day" attitude
Cawi:
Above suggestions to sweeten her current job satisfaction are reasonable -- at least when looked at from the outside. If those ideas are exhausted, change your lifestyle and adapt to the new reality, which may include debt and a richer intellectual income for you both. I'd rather live with a happy women in a tent than a miserable woman in a mansion.
Cawi:
Above suggestions to sweeten her current job satisfaction are reasonable -- at least when looked at from the outside. If those ideas are exhausted, change your lifestyle and adapt to the new reality, which may include debt and a richer intellectual income for you both. I'd rather live with a happy women in a tent than a miserable woman in a mansion.
Couldn't agree more which is why my wife and I both went back to school. She's been with same employer for over 20 years (accounting) and has never advanced although she does get raises. She likes her job and career in accounting so she went back to school with hopes of advancing or even leaving her employer for a much better opportunity. I went back to change careers. I was Naval Intel for 9 years and took my current job as a temporary means. It pays well and has good med/dental benefits. It's factory type work and not what I want for the rest of my life. I do a lot of computer work on my own and love it and went back to school to get into the computer industry. I just turned 39 and still have quite a few years of work left ahead of me. We agreed the debt was worth our happiness. I've always told my wife I'd rather be in debt and happy then have money and be unhappy.
latony007
New Member
The worst is when your in debt AND not happy
True...........
Billsbet0
New Member
I read all the comments and see good points to both sides, debt and finish school quicker or ride out the current situation. I did not see anyone comment on how much more an RN can make vs a blood tech. Right there I'd say go for the debt and get your gf/wife making more money as quickly as possible. Only a year and a half left, can't be that much more debt to come but how much more can she make as a full RN?
Good thing about RN's, your job can't be outsourced to a third world call center (called tech support once and realized they were reading scripts I wrote, had to point them to page 3 so they would know what to do next) and
there is such a shortage of rn's, no matter where you want to live, a job is waiting. Here in SoCal they have sign up bonuses trying to steal RN's from other medical centers. My buddy got laid off, his wife was a RN but had been a stay home mom for years. She went back to work within a couple weeks and is floating the family on part time work. She's making over $50 an hour. Actually, she's making more now than he did.
My 19 year old daughter passes out at the site of blood so this wasn't an option for her. Bummed me out, this is good steady work if you can deal with the body fluids.
No matter where you go for work or what you do there will be some kind of grief to deal with. That's, kind of, one of the reasons you get paid to be there...
Good thing about RN's, your job can't be outsourced to a third world call center (called tech support once and realized they were reading scripts I wrote, had to point them to page 3 so they would know what to do next) and
there is such a shortage of rn's, no matter where you want to live, a job is waiting. Here in SoCal they have sign up bonuses trying to steal RN's from other medical centers. My buddy got laid off, his wife was a RN but had been a stay home mom for years. She went back to work within a couple weeks and is floating the family on part time work. She's making over $50 an hour. Actually, she's making more now than he did.
My 19 year old daughter passes out at the site of blood so this wasn't an option for her. Bummed me out, this is good steady work if you can deal with the body fluids.
No matter where you go for work or what you do there will be some kind of grief to deal with. That's, kind of, one of the reasons you get paid to be there...
