Hilarious!!!
[NSFW] This is a bar. Tell me a joke. [NSFW]
- Thread starter BrueThru
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Bert-Aus
Well-Known Member
Peter the Nudist
While Peter was sunbathing naked at the beach at Noosa
For the sake of civility, and to keep it from getting sunburned, he had a hat over his private parts. A woman walks past and says, snickering, "If you were a gentleman you'd lift your hat."
He raised an eyebrow and replied, "If you were better looking it would lift itself."
While Peter was sunbathing naked at the beach at Noosa
For the sake of civility, and to keep it from getting sunburned, he had a hat over his private parts. A woman walks past and says, snickering, "If you were a gentleman you'd lift your hat."
He raised an eyebrow and replied, "If you were better looking it would lift itself."
Bert-Aus
Well-Known Member
Chicken Surprise
A couple go for a meal at a Chinese restaurant and order the 'Chicken Surprise',
The waiter brings the meal, served in a lidded cast iron pot.
.... Just as the wife is about to serve herself, the lid of the pot rises slightly and she briefly sees two beady little eyes looking around before the lid slams back down.
'Good grief, did you see that?' she asks her husband. He hadn't, so she asks him to look in the pot. He reaches for it and again the lid rises, and he sees two little eyes looking around before it slams down..
Rather perturbed, he calls the waiter over, explains what is happening, and demands an explanation.
'Please sir,' says the waiter, 'what you order?'
The husband replies, 'Chicken Surprise'
'Ah! So sorry,' says the waiter, 'I bring you Peeking Duck By Mistake
A couple go for a meal at a Chinese restaurant and order the 'Chicken Surprise',
The waiter brings the meal, served in a lidded cast iron pot.
.... Just as the wife is about to serve herself, the lid of the pot rises slightly and she briefly sees two beady little eyes looking around before the lid slams back down.
'Good grief, did you see that?' she asks her husband. He hadn't, so she asks him to look in the pot. He reaches for it and again the lid rises, and he sees two little eyes looking around before it slams down..
Rather perturbed, he calls the waiter over, explains what is happening, and demands an explanation.
'Please sir,' says the waiter, 'what you order?'
The husband replies, 'Chicken Surprise'
'Ah! So sorry,' says the waiter, 'I bring you Peeking Duck By Mistake
50 fun things in the elevator
1. Make race car noises when people get on and off.
2. Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.
3. Grimace painfully while slapping your forehead and muttering, "Shut up dammit, all of you just SHUT UP!"
4. Whistle the first 7 notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.
5. Sell Girl Scout Cookies.
6. On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.
7. Shave.
8. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask, "Got enough air in there?"
9. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear your upside-down.
10. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
11. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to pull the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
12. Lean over to another passenger and whisper, "Ever had a Wet Willy?"
13. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you "Admiral."
14. One word: Flatulence!
15. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.
16. Do Tai Chi exercises.
17. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on."
18. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back, "Oh, not now, damn motion sickness!"
19. Give religious tracts to each passenger.
20. Meow occasionally.
21. Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.
22. Frown and mutter, "Gotta go, gotta go," then sigh and say, "oops!"
23. Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.
24. Sing "Mary Had a Little Lamb" while continuously pushing buttons.
25. Holler, "Chutes away!!" whenever the elevator descends.
26. Walk on with a cooler that says "Human Head" on the side.
27. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce, "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.
28. Burp, then say, "Mmmmm.....tasty!"
29. Leave a box between the doors.
30. Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them.
31. Wear a hand puppet and talk to the other passengers "through" it.
32. Start a sing-along.
33. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask, "Is that your beeper?"
34. Play the accordion.
35. Shadow box.
36. Say, "Ding!" at each floor.
37. Lean against the button panel.
38. Say, "I wonder what all these do?" and then push ALL the red buttons.
39. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
40. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."
41.Bring a chair along.
42.Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger, "Wanna see wha in muh mouf??"
43.Blow spit bubbles.
44.Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.
45.Announce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host body."
46.Carry a blanket a clutch it protectively.
47.Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
48.Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at other passengers.
49.Stare at your thumb and say, "I think it's getting bigger."
50.If anyone brushes against you, recoil fiercely and scream, "BAD TOUCH
1. Make race car noises when people get on and off.
2. Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.
3. Grimace painfully while slapping your forehead and muttering, "Shut up dammit, all of you just SHUT UP!"
4. Whistle the first 7 notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.
5. Sell Girl Scout Cookies.
6. On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.
7. Shave.
8. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask, "Got enough air in there?"
9. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear your upside-down.
10. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
11. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to pull the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
12. Lean over to another passenger and whisper, "Ever had a Wet Willy?"
13. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you "Admiral."
14. One word: Flatulence!
15. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.
16. Do Tai Chi exercises.
17. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on."
18. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back, "Oh, not now, damn motion sickness!"
19. Give religious tracts to each passenger.
20. Meow occasionally.
21. Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.
22. Frown and mutter, "Gotta go, gotta go," then sigh and say, "oops!"
23. Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.
24. Sing "Mary Had a Little Lamb" while continuously pushing buttons.
25. Holler, "Chutes away!!" whenever the elevator descends.
26. Walk on with a cooler that says "Human Head" on the side.
27. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce, "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.
28. Burp, then say, "Mmmmm.....tasty!"
29. Leave a box between the doors.
30. Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them.
31. Wear a hand puppet and talk to the other passengers "through" it.
32. Start a sing-along.
33. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask, "Is that your beeper?"
34. Play the accordion.
35. Shadow box.
36. Say, "Ding!" at each floor.
37. Lean against the button panel.
38. Say, "I wonder what all these do?" and then push ALL the red buttons.
39. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
40. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."
41.Bring a chair along.
42.Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger, "Wanna see wha in muh mouf??"
43.Blow spit bubbles.
44.Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.
45.Announce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host body."
46.Carry a blanket a clutch it protectively.
47.Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
48.Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at other passengers.
49.Stare at your thumb and say, "I think it's getting bigger."
50.If anyone brushes against you, recoil fiercely and scream, "BAD TOUCH
danieljardim
New Member
A Harley and a Jar of Vaseline
Joe wanted to buy a motorcycle.
He doesn't have much luck, until one day, he comes across a Harley with a 'for sale' sign on it.
The bike seems even better than a new one, although it is 10 years old.
It's shiny and in absolute mint condition.
He immediately buys it and asks the seller how he kept it in such great condition for 10 years
'Well, it's quite simple really,' says the seller, 'whenever the bike is outside and it's gonna rain, rub Vaseline on the chrome.
It protects it from the rain.' (true story)
And he hands Joe a jar of Vaseline.
That night, his girlfriend, Sandra, invites him over to meet her parents. Naturally, they take the bike there.
But just before they enter the house, Sandra stops him and says, 'I have to tell you something about my family before we go in.'
'When we eat dinner, we don't talk.
In fact, the first person who says anything during dinner has to do the dishes.'
'No problem,' he says.. And in they go.
Joe is shocked.
Right smack in the middle of the living room is a huge stack of dirty dishes.
In the kitchen is another huge stack of dishes.
Piled up on the stairs, in the corridor, everywhere he looks.
Dirty dishes.
They sit down to dinner, and sure enough, no one says a word.
As dinner progresses, Joe decides to take advantage of the situation.
So he leans over and kisses Sandra.
No one says a word.
So he reaches over and fondles her breasts.
Still, nobody says a word.
So he stands up, grabs her, rips her clothes off, throws her on the table and screws her, right there in front of her parents.
His girlfriend is a little flustered, her dad is obviously livid and her mom horrified when he sits back down, but no one says a word.
He looks at her mom.
'She's got a great body,' he thinks.
So he grabs the mom, bends her over the dinner table, pulls down her panties, and screws her every which way but loose right there on the dinner table.
After she has a big orgasm, he sits down again.
Now his girlfriend is furious and her dad is boiling, the Mom is pleasantly
beaming.
But still.... Total silence.
All of a sudden there is a loud clap of thunder, and it starts to rain.
Joe remembers his bike, so he pulls the jar of Vaseline from his pocket.
Suddenly the father shouted.
I'll do the dishes!!
Joe wanted to buy a motorcycle.
He doesn't have much luck, until one day, he comes across a Harley with a 'for sale' sign on it.
The bike seems even better than a new one, although it is 10 years old.
It's shiny and in absolute mint condition.
He immediately buys it and asks the seller how he kept it in such great condition for 10 years
'Well, it's quite simple really,' says the seller, 'whenever the bike is outside and it's gonna rain, rub Vaseline on the chrome.
It protects it from the rain.' (true story)
And he hands Joe a jar of Vaseline.
That night, his girlfriend, Sandra, invites him over to meet her parents. Naturally, they take the bike there.
But just before they enter the house, Sandra stops him and says, 'I have to tell you something about my family before we go in.'
'When we eat dinner, we don't talk.
In fact, the first person who says anything during dinner has to do the dishes.'
'No problem,' he says.. And in they go.
Joe is shocked.
Right smack in the middle of the living room is a huge stack of dirty dishes.
In the kitchen is another huge stack of dishes.
Piled up on the stairs, in the corridor, everywhere he looks.
Dirty dishes.
They sit down to dinner, and sure enough, no one says a word.
As dinner progresses, Joe decides to take advantage of the situation.
So he leans over and kisses Sandra.
No one says a word.
So he reaches over and fondles her breasts.
Still, nobody says a word.
So he stands up, grabs her, rips her clothes off, throws her on the table and screws her, right there in front of her parents.
His girlfriend is a little flustered, her dad is obviously livid and her mom horrified when he sits back down, but no one says a word.
He looks at her mom.
'She's got a great body,' he thinks.
So he grabs the mom, bends her over the dinner table, pulls down her panties, and screws her every which way but loose right there on the dinner table.
After she has a big orgasm, he sits down again.
Now his girlfriend is furious and her dad is boiling, the Mom is pleasantly
beaming.
But still.... Total silence.
All of a sudden there is a loud clap of thunder, and it starts to rain.
Joe remembers his bike, so he pulls the jar of Vaseline from his pocket.
Suddenly the father shouted.
I'll do the dishes!!
This isn't a joke, but rather a TEST for some of us "older" boomers...
I'll post the answers tomorrow... In the meantime, write down your answers to the following 20 questions, and see how good your memory is...
This is NOT a pushover test. It's a Baby Boomer era test!
There are 20 questions. Average score is supposedly 12 (which I find difficult to believe, since I got 'em all). However, this one will be difficult for the younger set. (DUDE!)
Have fun!
1. What builds strong bodies 12 ways?
A. Flintstones vitamins
B. The Buttmaster
C. Spaghetti
D. Wonder Bread
E. Orange Juice
F. Milk
G. Cod Liver Oil
2. Before he was Muhammed Ali, he was...
A. Sugar Ray Robinson
B. Roy Orbison
C. Gene Autry
D. Rudolph Valentino
E. Fabian
F. Mickey Mantle
G. Cassius Clay
3. Pogo, the comic strip character said, 'We have met the enemy and...
A. It's you
B. He is us
C. It's the Grinch
D. He wasn't home
E. He's really me and you
F. We quit
G. He surrendered
4. Good night, David...
A. Good night, Chet
B. Sleep well
C. Good night, Irene
D. Good night, Gracie
E. See you later, alligator
F. Until tomorrow
G. Good night, Steve
5. You'll wonder where the yellow went...
A. When you use Tide
B. When you lose your crayons
C. When you clean your tub
D. If you paint the room blue
E. If you buy a soft water tank
F. When you use Lady Clairol
G. When you brush your teeth with Pepsodent
6. Before he was the Skipper's Little Buddy, Bob Denver was Dobie's friend...
A. Stuart Whitman
B Randolph Scott
C. Steve Reeves
D. Maynard G. Krebs
E. Corky B. Dork
F. Dave the Whale
G. Zippy Zoo
7. Liar, liar...
A. You're a liar
B. Your nose is growing
C. Pants on fire
D. Join the choir
E. Jump up higher
F. On the wire
G. I'm telling Mom
8. Meanwhile, back in Metropolis, Superman fights never ending battle for truth, justice and...
A. Wheaties
B. Lois Lane
C. TV rating
D. World peace
E. Red tights
F. The American way
G. News headlines
9. Hey kids! What time is it?
A. It's time for Yogi Bear
B. It's time to do your homework
C. It's Howdy Doody Time
D. It's time for Romper Room
E. It's bedtime
F. The Mighty Mouse Hour
G. Scooby Doo Time
10. Lions and tigers and bears....
A. Yikes
B. Oh, no
C. Gee whiz
D. I'm scared
E. Oh my
F. Help! Help!
G. Let's run
11. Bob Dylan advised us never to trust anyone...
A. Over 40
B. Wearing a uniform
C. Carrying a briefcase
D. Over 30
E. You don't know
F. Who says, 'Trust me'
G. Who eats tofu
12. NFL quarterback who appeared in a television commercial wearing women's stockings...
A. Troy Aikman
B. Kenny Stabler
C. Joe Namath
D. Roger Staubach
E. Joe Montana
F. Steve Young
G. John Elway
13. Brylcream...
A. Smear it on
B. You'll smell great
C. Tame that cowlick
D. Grease ball heaven
E. It's a dream
F. We're your team
G. A little dab'll do ya
14. I found my thrill...
A. In Blueberry muffins
B. With my man, Bill
C. Down at the mill
D. Over the window sill
E. With thyme and dill
F. Too late to enjoy
G. On Blueberry Hill
15. Before Robin Williams, Peter Pan was played by...
A.. Clark Gable
B. Mary Martin
C. Doris Day
D. Errol Flynn
E. Sally Fields
F. Jim Carrey
G. Jay Leno
16. Name the Beatles...
A. John, Steve, George, Ringo
B. John, Paul, George, Roscoe
C. John, Paul, Stacey, Ringo
D. Jay, Paul, George, Ringo
E. Lewis, Peter, George, Ringo
F. Jason, Betty, Skipper, Hazel
G. John, Paul, George, Ringo
17. I wonder, wonder, who…
A. Who ate the leftovers?
B. Who did the laundry?
C. Was it you?
D. Who wrote the book of love?
E. Who I am?
F. Passed the test?
G. Knocked on the door?
18. I'm strong to the finish...
A. Cause I eats my broccoli
B. Cause I eats me spinach
C. Cause I lift weights
D. Cause I'm the hero
E. And don't you forget it
F. Cause Olive Oyl loves me
G. To outlast Bluto
19. When it's least expected, you're elected, you're the star today…
A. Smile, you're on Candid Camera
B. Smile, you're on Star Search
C. Smile, you won the lottery
D. Smile, we're watching you
E. Smile, the world sees you
F. Smile, you're a hit
G. Smile, you're on TV
20. What do M & M's do?
A. Make your tummy happy!
B. Melt in your mouth, not in your pocket
C. Make you fat
D. Melt your heart
E. Make you popular
F. Melt in your mouth, not in your hand
G. Come in colors
Answers (for those of you that care):
1. D 11. D
2. G 12. C
3. B 13. G
4. A 14. G
5. G 15. B
6. D 16. G
7. C 17. D
8. F 18. B
9. C 19. A
10. E 20. F
I'll post the answers tomorrow... In the meantime, write down your answers to the following 20 questions, and see how good your memory is...
This is NOT a pushover test. It's a Baby Boomer era test!
There are 20 questions. Average score is supposedly 12 (which I find difficult to believe, since I got 'em all). However, this one will be difficult for the younger set. (DUDE!)
Have fun!
1. What builds strong bodies 12 ways?
A. Flintstones vitamins
B. The Buttmaster
C. Spaghetti
D. Wonder Bread
E. Orange Juice
F. Milk
G. Cod Liver Oil
2. Before he was Muhammed Ali, he was...
A. Sugar Ray Robinson
B. Roy Orbison
C. Gene Autry
D. Rudolph Valentino
E. Fabian
F. Mickey Mantle
G. Cassius Clay
3. Pogo, the comic strip character said, 'We have met the enemy and...
A. It's you
B. He is us
C. It's the Grinch
D. He wasn't home
E. He's really me and you
F. We quit
G. He surrendered
4. Good night, David...
A. Good night, Chet
B. Sleep well
C. Good night, Irene
D. Good night, Gracie
E. See you later, alligator
F. Until tomorrow
G. Good night, Steve
5. You'll wonder where the yellow went...
A. When you use Tide
B. When you lose your crayons
C. When you clean your tub
D. If you paint the room blue
E. If you buy a soft water tank
F. When you use Lady Clairol
G. When you brush your teeth with Pepsodent
6. Before he was the Skipper's Little Buddy, Bob Denver was Dobie's friend...
A. Stuart Whitman
B Randolph Scott
C. Steve Reeves
D. Maynard G. Krebs
E. Corky B. Dork
F. Dave the Whale
G. Zippy Zoo
7. Liar, liar...
A. You're a liar
B. Your nose is growing
C. Pants on fire
D. Join the choir
E. Jump up higher
F. On the wire
G. I'm telling Mom
8. Meanwhile, back in Metropolis, Superman fights never ending battle for truth, justice and...
A. Wheaties
B. Lois Lane
C. TV rating
D. World peace
E. Red tights
F. The American way
G. News headlines
9. Hey kids! What time is it?
A. It's time for Yogi Bear
B. It's time to do your homework
C. It's Howdy Doody Time
D. It's time for Romper Room
E. It's bedtime
F. The Mighty Mouse Hour
G. Scooby Doo Time
10. Lions and tigers and bears....
A. Yikes
B. Oh, no
C. Gee whiz
D. I'm scared
E. Oh my
F. Help! Help!
G. Let's run
11. Bob Dylan advised us never to trust anyone...
A. Over 40
B. Wearing a uniform
C. Carrying a briefcase
D. Over 30
E. You don't know
F. Who says, 'Trust me'
G. Who eats tofu
12. NFL quarterback who appeared in a television commercial wearing women's stockings...
A. Troy Aikman
B. Kenny Stabler
C. Joe Namath
D. Roger Staubach
E. Joe Montana
F. Steve Young
G. John Elway
13. Brylcream...
A. Smear it on
B. You'll smell great
C. Tame that cowlick
D. Grease ball heaven
E. It's a dream
F. We're your team
G. A little dab'll do ya
14. I found my thrill...
A. In Blueberry muffins
B. With my man, Bill
C. Down at the mill
D. Over the window sill
E. With thyme and dill
F. Too late to enjoy
G. On Blueberry Hill
15. Before Robin Williams, Peter Pan was played by...
A.. Clark Gable
B. Mary Martin
C. Doris Day
D. Errol Flynn
E. Sally Fields
F. Jim Carrey
G. Jay Leno
16. Name the Beatles...
A. John, Steve, George, Ringo
B. John, Paul, George, Roscoe
C. John, Paul, Stacey, Ringo
D. Jay, Paul, George, Ringo
E. Lewis, Peter, George, Ringo
F. Jason, Betty, Skipper, Hazel
G. John, Paul, George, Ringo
17. I wonder, wonder, who…
A. Who ate the leftovers?
B. Who did the laundry?
C. Was it you?
D. Who wrote the book of love?
E. Who I am?
F. Passed the test?
G. Knocked on the door?
18. I'm strong to the finish...
A. Cause I eats my broccoli
B. Cause I eats me spinach
C. Cause I lift weights
D. Cause I'm the hero
E. And don't you forget it
F. Cause Olive Oyl loves me
G. To outlast Bluto
19. When it's least expected, you're elected, you're the star today…
A. Smile, you're on Candid Camera
B. Smile, you're on Star Search
C. Smile, you won the lottery
D. Smile, we're watching you
E. Smile, the world sees you
F. Smile, you're a hit
G. Smile, you're on TV
20. What do M & M's do?
A. Make your tummy happy!
B. Melt in your mouth, not in your pocket
C. Make you fat
D. Melt your heart
E. Make you popular
F. Melt in your mouth, not in your hand
G. Come in colors
Answers (for those of you that care):
1. D 11. D
2. G 12. C
3. B 13. G
4. A 14. G
5. G 15. B
6. D 16. G
7. C 17. D
8. F 18. B
9. C 19. A
10. E 20. F
Last edited:
Bert-Aus
Well-Known Member
Paddy
Paddy was a youthful and hard working Irishman at a Coastal village in Ireland .
Daily he would pole a heavy old punt out to sea then work a heavy iron grapple to bring up the sand oysters which he sold to the local ice works. He was a man of regular habits he always arrived home each day at a certain time.
Sadly, Paddy did not realise the heavy grappling was taking a toll on a faulty heart.
One day he failed to come home so his wife contacted the Police to investigate him being missing.
They rowed out and found Paddy dead in The punt beside him a huge grapple full of oysters he'd tried to hoist aboard.
Headlines next day in the 'Irish Times Newspaper' Said.........................................
OYSTERS KILPATRICK!!!!
Paddy was a youthful and hard working Irishman at a Coastal village in Ireland .
Daily he would pole a heavy old punt out to sea then work a heavy iron grapple to bring up the sand oysters which he sold to the local ice works. He was a man of regular habits he always arrived home each day at a certain time.
Sadly, Paddy did not realise the heavy grappling was taking a toll on a faulty heart.
One day he failed to come home so his wife contacted the Police to investigate him being missing.
They rowed out and found Paddy dead in The punt beside him a huge grapple full of oysters he'd tried to hoist aboard.
Headlines next day in the 'Irish Times Newspaper' Said.........................................
OYSTERS KILPATRICK!!!!
Child: Dad I'm hungry
Dad: Just go tell your mother to make you a sandwich
Child: But...
Dad: what is it?
Child: shes out of the kitchen.
Dad: SHE'S WHAT!?
Dad: Just go tell your mother to make you a sandwich
Child: But...
Dad: what is it?
Child: shes out of the kitchen.
Dad: SHE'S WHAT!?
---
Son: Dad, why does the bride always wear white?
Dad: All kitchen appliances come in white
Dad: All kitchen appliances come in white
----
why did the woman cross the road?
i dont know either but that road better be in the ****** kitchen
i dont know either but that road better be in the ****** kitchen
----
Why doesn't a woman need a watch? Because there's a clock on the microwave
Idiosynocracy
New Member
Ugh I hate being Bi-polar. It's awesome.
haha I see what you did there
Idiosynocracy
New Member
Dyslexics, untie!
Abstinence
Previous Next
Three couples went in to see the minister to see how to become members of his church. The minister said that they would have to go without sex for two weeks and then come back and tell him how it went.
The first couple was retired, the second couple was middle-aged and the final couple was newlywed.
Two weeks went by, and the couples returned to the minister. The retired couple said it was no problem at all. The middle-aged couple said it was tough for the first week, but after that, it was no problem. The newlyweds said it was fine until she dropped the can of paint.
"Can of PAINT!" exclaimed the minister.
"Yeah," said the newlywed man. "She dropped the can and when she bent over to pick it up I had to have her right there and then. Lust took over."
The minister just shook his head and said that they were not welcome in the church. "That's okay," said the man. "We're not welcome in Home Depot either."
Previous Next
Three couples went in to see the minister to see how to become members of his church. The minister said that they would have to go without sex for two weeks and then come back and tell him how it went.
The first couple was retired, the second couple was middle-aged and the final couple was newlywed.
Two weeks went by, and the couples returned to the minister. The retired couple said it was no problem at all. The middle-aged couple said it was tough for the first week, but after that, it was no problem. The newlyweds said it was fine until she dropped the can of paint.
"Can of PAINT!" exclaimed the minister.
"Yeah," said the newlywed man. "She dropped the can and when she bent over to pick it up I had to have her right there and then. Lust took over."
The minister just shook his head and said that they were not welcome in the church. "That's okay," said the man. "We're not welcome in Home Depot either."